Sexual Relationships 性关系 There were other areas of continuing disappointment and frustration for him, in which he saw himself as, and became in fact, the sufferer. One of these important areas was that of his sexual activity. His relationships with girls were troublesome and troubled. He usually had several girls in which he was interested or who were interested in him. These relationships all had a quality of intense clinging dependency and a longing for intimacy. Fred felt almost desperately that he needed a woman for love and approval and warmth and comfort. It was terribly important to him that he be able to satisfy these girls sexually. He worried about his sexual potency and adequacy. He would have intercourse and then ask the girl whether his penis was big enough, whether it was bigger than the penises of other guys she had slept with, whether he had satisfied her as well as other guys, etc. 还有一些领域令他持续感到失望和沮丧，在这些领域中，他视自己为受害者，而事实上也确实如此。其中一个重要领域就是他的性生活。他与女孩们的关系麻烦不断、充满困扰。他通常会对几个女孩感兴趣，或者有几个女孩对他感兴趣。这些关系都带有一种强烈的依附性和对亲密的渴望。弗雷德几乎绝望地感到自己需要一个女人来给予他爱、认可、温暖和安慰。对他来说，能够在性方面满足这些女孩是极其重要的。他担心自己的性能力和是否足够好。他会发生性关系，然后问女孩他的阴茎是否足够大，是否比她睡过的其他男人的阴茎都大，他是否像其他男人一样满足了她，等等。 But these relationships were difficult for him, even when his wishes for closeness and warm responsiveness were being met. The closeness itself was threatening. He feared women, feared their demands on him, feared their manipulating and controlling him, feared his own dependency and his own wishes to be taken care of by them in a regressed and infantile way. He was able from time to time to relate these fears and concerns to his involvement with his mother. He feared and hated her control over his life, and he dreaded the control that any woman might exercise over him if he were to allow himself to become permanently attached to her. His anxieties were more than simple castration fears—although this was certain a detectible issue in his material—but his fear stemmed even more fundamentally from a much deeper and more primitive level of his psychic organization. The issue was one of engulfment, of being swallowed up and devoured by the powerful and all-consuming woman. 然而，即使他对亲密和热烈回应的渴望得到满足，这些关系对他来说也是困难的。亲密关系本身就具有威胁性。他害怕女性，害怕她们对他提出要求，害怕她们操纵和控制他，害怕自己对她们的依赖，以及自己以退行和幼稚的方式渴望得到她们的照顾。他时不时地能够将这些恐惧和担忧与他与母亲的牵扯联系在一起。他害怕并憎恨母亲对他生活的控制，如果他允许自己永久地依附于某个女性，他害怕任何女性都可能对他施加的这种控制。他的焦虑不仅仅是简单的阉割恐惧——尽管这在他的素材中确实是一个可以觉察到的问题——但他的恐惧更根本地源自于他心理组织中更深层、更原始的层面。问题在于被吞噬，被强大而全知全能的女性所吞噬和消灭。 Along with this fundamental dread of the woman and her power, there was operative another perception of woman which saw them as defective and needy and damaged. His attitude to women in general was chauvinistic, regarding them as inferior to men in intelligence and general capacity for meaningful work or activity. This was interesting because these feelings were an affront to his liberal and revolutionary convictions, particularly in this era of women's liberation and equal rights. But in part his need to see women as defective was a protective screen against his fear of their hidden power, and a prop for his own inner feelings of weakness and inadequacy. As long as he could see them as weak and defective, he could both tolerate the exposure of his own weakness better and could allow himself to be more dependent with the concomitant threat of engulfment. 除了对女性和她的力量的根本恐惧之外，还有一种对女性的看法认为她们是有缺陷的、需要帮助的、受到伤害的。他对女性的态度总体上是沙文主义的，认为她们在智力和从事有意义的工作或活动的一般能力上不如男性。这很有趣，因为这些感觉与他的自由主义和革命信念相冲突，特别是在这个妇女解放和平等权利的时代。但部分地，他需要将女性视为有缺陷的，这是一种保护屏障，可以抵御他对她们隐藏力量的恐惧，也是支撑他自己内心虚弱和不足感的一种支柱。只要他能看到她们的软弱和缺陷，他就能更好地容忍自己弱点的暴露，并允许自己更加依赖，同时伴随着被吞噬的威胁。 Behind this level of his concern was the further and deeper issue of his homosexual concerns. He had never indulged in homosexual practices and did not admit to or recognize any homosexual interests. But it remained a continual concern for him. In part it lay behind his compulsion to have a woman to sleep with, as a means of demonstrating his masculinity which was under continuous question and doubt internally. It determined his view of himself as weak and inadequate and as somehow defective and damaged. His fear of homosexuality was thus responsible to some extent for his rage and recrimination against his parents, against his father for not providing a strong and close alliance which could withstand the powerful subjugating and castrating mother, and against his mother for being so smothering and controlling. The only directly homosexual material that he produced in the course of his treatment was in the form of a dream. He dreamt that he was having intercourse with a beautiful girl and during the intercourse she turned into a boy. The patient was rather disturbed by this dream, wondering whether it meant that he was really homosexual after all. But he was able to laugh at it and then to talk about his attitudes toward homosexuality. He felt sorry for queers and wondered what it must be like to be queer. He admitted to curiosity about them but added that he had never felt any wishes to try it out. He felt that even though it was a deviant position he ought to try to understand their situation and be tolerant of it. 在他所关心的这一层面背后，是他更深层次的对同性恋问题的关注。他从未沉迷于同性恋行为，也没有承认或认识到任何同性恋兴趣。但这仍然是他持续关注的问题。在某种程度上，这背后是他强迫自己与女性发生性关系的冲动，以此作为展示自己男性魅力的手段，而他的男性魅力一直受到内心的质疑和怀疑。这决定了他对自己的看法是虚弱、不足、有缺陷和受到伤害的。因此，他对同性恋的恐惧在一定程度上引发了他对父母的愤怒和谴责，他怨恨父亲没有提供一个强大而紧密的联盟来抵抗母亲强大的征服和阉割力量，他也怨恨母亲如此窒息和控制。在治疗过程中，他唯一直接产生的同性恋素材是以梦的形式出现的。他梦见自己正在和一个漂亮的女孩发生性关系，在性交过程中，她变成了一个男孩。这个梦让病人相当不安，他想知道这是否意味着他终究是同性恋。但他能够笑着谈论它，然后谈论他对同性恋的态度。他为同性恋者感到难过，想知道成为同性恋者会是什么样子。他承认对他们感到好奇，但补充说他从未有过任何尝试的愿望。他觉得即使这是一个偏离常态的立场，他也应该试着理解他们的情况并对此保持宽容。