Growing Up Scared 在惊吓中长大 In this general situation in which the stability and psychic health of Mrs.G. was so questionable and in which she was constantly and chronically depressed and irritable, Mr.G. exercised himself to support her and protect her and to fill in for her inadequacies. In the face of his wife's inability to cook, he did the cooking. In the face of her inept housekeeping, he did the cleaning and washing. In the face of her irritation and depression, he was constantly warning the children not to upset her, not to cause any trouble. His often repeated warning was that if the girls were not obedient and good, their mother might get sick. It seemed that Gloria took this warning to heart, and that Gladys did not take it very seriously at all. Gladys sought relief from the tension and dificulties at home by immersing herself in friendships and activities in school and elsewhere. Gloria, however, became more and more tied into the relationship with her parents. She tried desperately and seriously to be good and to please her mother, constantly hoping to gain her mother's appreciation and affection, but her attempts were never successful. She never felt that her mother approved of her or loved her. When her attempts were met with mother's irritation and scolding or with mother's depressive withdrawal, she felt confused and helpless. She began to feel somehow that she was responsible for her mother's poor moods and anger and that the reason that things were so bad at home was somehow due to her. She began to think of herself as evil and undesirable and hateful. These feelings were reinforced by her father's constant warnings and scoldings to the effect that she was hurting her mother by being naughty or uncooperative. These influences provided a continuing menace to Gloria's well-being and sense of self. 在这种情况下，G.夫人的稳定和心理健康是如此令人怀疑，她不断地、长期地抑郁和易怒，G.先生努力支持她，保护她，填补她的不足。由于他妻子不会做饭，他自己做饭了。面对她笨拙的家务，他做了清洁和洗涤。面对她的愤怒和沮丧，他不断地警告孩子们不要惹她生气，不要制造任何麻烦。他经常反复警告说，如果女孩子不听话不乖，她们的妈妈可能会生病。看来格洛丽亚把这个警告放在心上，而格拉迪斯根本不把它当回事。格拉迪斯把自己沉浸在学校和其他地方的友谊和活动中，寻求从家里的紧张和分歧中解脱出来。然而，格洛丽亚与她父母的关系变得越来越紧密。她拼命地、认真地想变乖，想讨妈妈的欢心，总是希望能得到妈妈的赏识和喜爱，但她的努力从来没有成功过。她从来没有感觉到她的母亲认可她或爱她。当她的尝试遇到母亲的愤怒和责骂，或母亲抑郁的退缩，她感到困惑和无助。她开始觉得她应该为她母亲的坏心情和愤怒负责，而家里的事情之所以如此糟糕，不知怎的是由于她。她开始认为自己是邪恶的、不受欢迎的、可恨的。她父亲不断地警告和责骂她，说她淘气或不合作，伤害了她母亲，这更加深了她的这种感情。这些影响对格洛丽亚的健康和自我意识构成了持续的威胁。 During these early Oedipal and latency years, Gloria developed a significant number of symptoms. Nightmares became a problem. She would frequently have terrifying dreams and would awaken from them feeling terribly frightened and helpless. She felt that there was no one to whom she could turn and nowhere she could get any help. She was frequently terribly frightened of going to bed because of the nightmares—but couldn't tell her mother or father. Another prominent symptom was phobic anxiety. This remained a more or less constant feature of her pathology from very early years. Phobic concerns were a significant part of her experience for as long as she could remember. Gloria was able to recall fears as a very young child that her father was going to die. She also remembered her fear that the family house was going to burn down. This was a continual preoccupation for her for a long period of time, and she was particularly concerned that the house would burn while she was asleep. In one of the early school grades she recalled hearing someone—probably her parents—talking about spinal meningitis. At the time one of her classmates was thought to have polio. This was still in the period before the polio vaccines had received wide acceptance and distribution. Gloria was terrified of getting spinal meningitis, and for a time refused to go to school. 在俄狄浦斯早期和潜伏期，格洛丽亚出现了大量的症状。噩梦变成了一个问题。她常常做可怕的梦，从梦中醒来时感到非常害怕和无助。她觉得没有人可以求助，也没有地方可以帮助她。她经常因为噩梦而非常害怕上床睡觉——但却不能告诉她的父母。另一个突出的症状是恐惧焦虑。从很小的时候起，这就或多或少一直是她的病理特征。从她记事起，恐惧就一直是她经历的重要部分。格洛丽亚还能回忆起小时候对父亲即将去世的恐惧。她还记得她担心家里的房子会被烧毁。在很长一段时间里，这一直是她最关心的事情，她特别担心在她睡着的时候房子会被烧毁。在她记得的一个小学低年级，她听到有人——可能是她的父母——谈论脊髓脑膜炎。当时她的一个同学被认为患有小儿麻痹症。这仍然是在脊髓灰质炎疫苗得到广泛接受和分发之前的时期。格洛丽亚害怕得脊髓脑膜炎，一度拒绝上学。