A Reenactment 重演 It was at this juncture in Henry's treatment, after about six months in the hospital, that the next important development in his course occurred. He gradually became involved with a young married woman on the service. It was understandably difficult to keep such involvements unnoticed on an open hospital service, so that the matter was brought to my attention almost from the start. Needless to say, any sexual activity among patients was proscribed by hospital rules and frowned on by the administration. So the increasingly intense affair was a prominent focus of Henry's psychotherapy for a considerable period of time. The affair was of interest in that it provided another repetition of the same pattern that had led Henry to the brink of suicide so often before. My therapeutic effort was to try to help him explore what was happening in order to help him gain some insight into the motivations behind this severely self-defeating and self-destructive aspect of his life. 在亨利接受治疗的这个关键时刻，也就是住院大约六个月后，他的病程出现了下一个重要的发展。他逐渐与病房里一位年轻的已婚女子产生了纠葛。可想而知，在开放的病房环境中，这样的纠葛很难不被察觉，所以这件事几乎从一开始就引起了我的注意。毋庸置疑，医院规定禁止患者之间发生任何性行为，管理层也对此持反对态度。因此，在相当长的一段时间里，这段愈演愈烈的风流韵事成为了亨利心理治疗的一个重点。这件事之所以引人关注，是因为它再次重现了之前多次将亨利推向自杀边缘的相同模式。我的治疗目标是帮助他探索正在发生的事情，以便让他深入了解自己生活中这种严重自败和自我毁灭行为背后的动机。 The affair started by Henry and this woman playing games together. He described playing Scrabble with her. As they played he said that certain words kept coming up that indicated to him that she wanted him. He claimed that he couldn't believe his eyes, couldn't believe that she was trying to seduce him. However, he could not be specific about what the words were or how he knew that she was seducing him. The factual data were impossible to determine. But Henry's rather consistent style was to portray himself as the passive victim in all his relationships with women. They were always the ones who seduced him, involved him sexually, roused his desires and passions and then rebuffed and rejected him. He was never able to acknowledge his own role in these relationships, and so it was in this one. He consistently maintained that he did not know what was going on, that he had been led on unwittingly and naively, and that he was helpless to stop his sexual involvement. It seems more likely that what actually happened was more a product of his erotomania than any actual seduction. 亨利和这名女子因一起玩游戏而开始了这段纠葛。他描述说，他们一起玩拼字游戏。在玩游戏的过程中，他说一些特定的词语不断出现，让他觉得她对他有意思。他声称自己简直不敢相信自己的眼睛，不敢相信她竟然在试图勾引他。然而，他却无法具体说出这些词语是什么，也不知道自己是怎么知道她在勾引他的。事实真相已无法确定。但亨利在与女性交往时，一向表现出一种相当一致的风格，那就是把自己描绘成被动的受害者。总是女性勾引他，与他发生性关系，激起他的欲望和激情，然后又冷落他、拒绝他。他从未承认过自己在这些关系中的作用，这次也不例外。他始终坚持说，自己不知道是怎么回事，是被天真无邪地诱导了，他无力阻止自己的性纠葛。看起来，实际情况更有可能是他色情狂想的产物，而非什么真正的勾引。 The intensity of the relationship was building. They started having intercourse. Henry continued to present his role in the relationship as passive and helpless. She was seducing him. She was the one who insisted on intercourse. He placed the entire responsibility for the relationship and for what happened in it on her shoulders. He absolved himself of any blame. He could not see that what was happening was detrimental in any way to her or to himself. If anyone was hurt by it, he felt it was certainly not her, but himself. He felt that if anyone was being taken advantage of, it was himself. He drew the analogy between his affair and his relationship with his wife. She was the one who had enticed and come after him. She had seduced and involved him, gotten him to marry her, and then had turned against him and abandoned him. 这段关系的热度不断升温。他们开始发生性关系。亨利继续把自己在这段关系中的角色描绘成被动且无助的。是她在勾引他。是她坚持要发生性关系。他把这段关系以及其中发生的一切责任都推到了她身上。他为自己开脱，认为自己没有任何过错。他看不出这件事对她或对自己有任何害处。他觉得，如果这件事伤害了谁，那肯定不是她，而是他自己。他觉得，如果说有人被利用了，那也只能是他自己。他将自己这段风流韵事与他和妻子的关系相提并论。他认为，是妻子诱惑他、追求他。是妻子勾引他、与他纠缠，让他娶了她，然后又背叛他、抛弃他。 As the relationship intensified he became more suicidal. It seemed that as he became more involved sexually his need to feel close and to merge with the object became increasingly intense. He could not get close enough. As his needs became more intense he felt increasingly frustrated and impatient. He complained repeatedly that what he wanted was a really close and permanent relationship. But no relationship seemed capable of satisfying this deep and primitive for total inclusion and total merging. The intensity of this need, its engulfing quality, and its uncompromising demandingness all frightened the woman. It stimulated her fears of being swallowed up and consumed by this passionate need. 随着这段关系越来越深入，他的自杀念头也越来越强烈。似乎随着他在性方面越陷越深，他想要与对方亲近、与对方融为一体的需求也变得越来越强烈。他觉得自己怎么也不够亲近。随着他的需求愈发强烈，他感到越来越沮丧，越来越不耐烦。他一遍遍地抱怨，说自己想要的是真正亲密且永久的关系。但似乎没有任何一段关系能满足他这种深层次的、原始的、想要完全融入和完全合一的需求。这种需求的强烈程度、它的吞噬性，以及它毫不妥协的苛求，都让这名女子感到害怕。这激发了她内心的恐惧，担心自己被这种强烈的需求吞噬、消耗殆尽。