Sexual Rebellion 性叛逆 But in the face of these restrictions Karen had considerable difficulty. She found her parents' attitudes repressive and restrictive. During one year toward the end of her high school period, she lived with her family in the Philippines where the atmosphere was much more open and relaxed. She feels that during this time she went through a minor rebellion against her parents' restrictions, staying up late at night, smoking cigarettes, drinking rather heavily, and engaging in minor sexual episodes of kissing and petting. She was particularly resentful at having again to surrender this atmosphere in which she felt freer, as well as more accepted and popular among her peers. 但是面对这些限制，卡伦遇到了相当大的困难。她发现她父母的态度是压抑和限制性的。高中毕业前的一年，她和家人一起住在菲律宾，那里的氛围更加开放和放松。她觉得在这段时间里，她经历了一场轻微的反抗，反抗父母的限制，熬夜，抽烟，酗酒，还有一些轻微的性行为，比如亲吻和爱抚。她感到特别气愤的是，她不得不再次放弃这种使她感到更自由、更受同龄人接受和欢迎的气氛。 By the time she had graduated from high school and had entered college, Karen seemed to have reached a significant turning point in her development. When she arrived at the private eastern university at which she had matriculated, she decided it was time for her to throw off the restraints and restrictions that had been imposed on her for so long by her mother. At that point, she had never had intercourse. She determined that she would lose her virginity, and set about accomplishing this with considerable vengeance. Her mother had said to her on repeated occasions that men do not marry women who smoke and who are not virgins. Consequently Karen set about a rather intense program of heavy drinking, smoking, and sexual activity. She was quite successful in these endeavors, and became known as an "easy lay." She had frequent sexual experiences with many different men, even being unofficially taken over by a whole fraternity. She took satisfaction, even relish, out of the idea that she could lead such a life of sexual indulgence, while at the same time she performed paradoxically in a highly credible manner academically. She literally wanted to be all things to all men. She broke college rules carelessly, and almost seemed to flaunt herself in the face of any authority. When the dorm mother tried to set some limits on her, she became angry and incensed and rebellious, throwing things and smashing windows to have her own way. 当她从高中毕业进入大学时，卡伦似乎已经达到了她发展的一个重要转折点。当她来到她被录取的东部私立大学时，她决定是时候摆脱母亲强加给她的束缚和限制了。那时，她从未有过性生活。她下定决心要失贞，并开始以相当大的报复来实现这一点。她母亲曾多次对她说，男人不娶抽烟的女人，也不娶没有童贞的女人。因此，卡伦开始了一个相当激烈的计划，酗酒、抽烟和性行为。她在这些努力中取得了相当的成功，以“容易搞定”而闻名。她经常和许多不同的男人发生性关系，甚至被整个兄弟会非正式地接管。她从这样一种想法中得到满足，甚至是享受，即她可以过这样一种纵欲的生活，同时她在学术上的表现却反常地好。她真的想成为所有男人的一切。她漫步经心地违反校规，几乎是在任何权威面前炫耀自己。当管宿舍的阿姨试图给她设置一些限制时，她变得生气、愤怒和叛逆，她会随意扔东西、砸窗户，无人能拦。 There had to be a reaction to this pattern of frenetic acting out. When it became clear to her that she had established a rather unsavory reputation for herself on campus, she felt bitterly resentful and betrayed. She felt that the liberal atmosphere that she had imbibed on campus was in part responsible for her throwing off of restraints and inhibitions. When the judgmental and somewhat condemnatory attitudes came back to her, she felt somehow betrayed and used. She became deeply resentful of all of the boys at the college who had taken advantage of her willingness to be sexually available to them. Consequently, when she went on to graduate school she spent a rather extended period of about a year-and-a-half in which she shunned any sexual contacts and kept her social life to a minimum. During this period she rather obsessively concentrated on her academic activity and threw herself wholeheartedly and devotedly into her doctoral studies. 对于这种疯狂的行为模式，肯定会有一种反应。当她清楚地意识到自己在校园里已经树立了相当令人讨厌的名声时，她感到愤愤不平，遭到了背叛。她觉得她在校园里所吸收的自由气氛，在一定程度是她摆脱束缚和拘谨的原因。当她重新意识到这种带有批判和谴责意味的态度时，她觉得自己被背叛了，被利用了。她对大学里所有利用她的意愿与他们发生性关系的男生都深恶痛绝。因此，当她进入研究生院时，她花了相当长一段时间，大约一年半的时间里，她避免任何性接触，并将她的社交生活控制在最低限度。在这段时间里，她痴迷于自己的学术活动，全身心地投入到博士学习中。